More Than a Bargain

He wanted to know how many hours of ‘juice” I had on my laptop before needing to plug in, a friendly kind of question. Recovering from a recent stroke, my compatriot’s steps were tentative and safe, considering his new reality. Hie wife or partner stayed close and vigilant. We were in Starbucks, although it was…

Dreaming of Chocolate Pudding

It’s an interesting thing, becoming a widow and feeling everything about your physical self, shift. I remember walking through the grocery store, when Alan was sick, gathering up edibles in the form of pudding and things that were white or clear. For several months after he died, I wondered if anyone noticed I was now…

Beauty…

"WHAT THE LIVING DO" poem by Marie Howe Johnny, the kitchen sink has been clogged for days, some utensil probably fell down there. And the Drano won't work but smells dangerous, and the crusty dishes have piled up waiting for the plumber I still haven't called. This is the everyday we spoke of. It's winter…

Covid, Grief or is it Me?

These past few years have been draining for all of us, in ways that are still being calculated. When Life has had its way with you in other ways, it can be even more confusing, evaluating what came first, the chicken or the egg, so to speak. The feelings of isolation that continue because of…

I’m Not Fifteen Anymore

I’m noticing couples more often these days conversing over items in the grocery store, heads touching and choosing ink cartridges in Staples.  I remember similar collaborations and how we consulted over the smallest things just because of proximity. Small talk and small decisions are the ephemeral of life. That feeling of ease and communication is what…

Baby Bird

The little bundle of cells and life chirped (peeped) now and then and tentatively lifted its head and then a wing, collapsing into the corner of a salvaged food take out box.  It was a safe place to rest and recuperate and hopefully grow in the care of its savior, magical Maria.  Maria is a…

Try Love

To be in love with myself is something I’ve given lip service to, but never quite realized. I’m finally getting it, feeling it and oh my goodness, what a relief. How real and down to sea level can you get, is what I’m thinking. It started with deciding to cut my own hair again. My…

Touched

She said I “touched” her by noticing we hadn’t spoken for a while and if everything was ok, I wondered…if she was ok.  As it turned out, Life had come rolling over leaving grief and thanksgiving for the one who had survived and the one who died after a Pancreatic Cancer illness. So much to…

Turning Seventy

I can’t say much about this subject because I’m only one day in. I can say that it’s kind of shocked me, this aging thing. Seventy is a number I’ve seen come and go in relationship to others, but never gave it much notice in relationship to my own future. I love this about me……

Summer Solstice

I walked for miles and miles this morning, still wearing my black winter leggings and an oversize hooded shirt, no less. It was already so warm at 7:30 and I commented to the woman at the light as we waited together agreeing at least on the subject of weather. Actual eye contact and smiles were…